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Monday, May 9, 2011

Bet You Didn't See This Coming

Last weekend I showed my pussy to hundreds of people.

I know what you’re thinking; no way is her pussy pretty enough to be showed to that many people.

But you would be wrong. He definitely is. And the judge agreed.

When Darth Vader heard he was going to a cat show, this is how he looked:



Then he bent down and licked his penis. I tired to explain to him that it wasn’t my choice, that I’d simply promised the breeder I would take him to a show to see how he’d do, and that he’d better just look really crabby and he’d probably never had to do it again.

This is him looking crabby. In his litter box.



And this is him being manhandled by the judge.



As it turns out, people who take their cats to cat shows are very interesting. I saw one woman pushing her two cats in a stroller. I saw a man walking around carrying his huge Maine Coon as if it were a baby. And I saw a woman cry with joy when her ugly naked rat won something.

M and I spent most of the day feeling sorry for Darth Vader in his little cage, and generally not grooming him enough, if the other contestants were to believe. I don’t even brush my hair as much as these people brushed their cats’ coats. Actually, I don’t really brush my hair at all, but that’s beside the point. These people were brushing, spraying, rubbing, powdering, clipping, plucking and wiping their cats. Not necessarily in that order. I actually did bring a brush, but Darth Vader just wanted to play with it.

But M and I did do one thing to prepare the poor kitty for his show. We washed him. Heh heh.



Tell me that isn’t the funniest thing ever. He looks like one of those long-haired rats people are so fond of, what are they called? I can never remember. Oh! Chihuahuas! He looks like a Chihuahua. Try to spell that five times fast.

And this is what we won. I'm going to pin it to the wall so that it's the first thing people see when they come through the front door.




Because more pictures of cats is exactly what the internet needs. *
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46 comments:

  1. Sweet, sweet kitten-cat. Congrats on the ribbon. And he actually ALLOWS you to give him a bath? My cat would rip my throat out with her teeth if I tried that! (She has no front claws, so her defensive device is her teeth.) Ahh, the life of animal shows. We have neighbors that used to 'show' their Irish setters. That's all I have to say on that subject. ;)

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  2. Aww.... Darth Vader looks so sad all wet! Poor thing!


    And, um.. I cannot stop laughing at this: "I saw one woman pushing her two cats in a stroller." Now that's something you don't see every day!

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  3. I think more pictures of a wet Darth Vader is exactly what the world needs! Congrats on the black ribbon! (What did you do to be EX 1?)

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  4. Definitely not enough cats on the Internet. Or in Finland, apparently, since they are seemingly so rare they must be treated like children. I will send you Lola. You're welcome. I'm sure she won't try to kill you.

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  5. Yes, more cats, more CATS! Darth Vader is adorable.


    That was
    my cat's name, too!

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  6. What a gorgeous cat!!!!!!

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  7. He's super pretty glad he won something, it's the least they could do since he had to get all wet. I had a cat that used to get in the bathtub with me when I was a kid.

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  8. We have two cats. You're welcome to them. Canada's not going to miss these two stupid animals. Oh, don't get me wrong. I like cats. Other people's cats. Congratulations to Darth. May the fur be with you.

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  9. Gah! I had an Old English Sheepdog and did the show thing. Never again, I tell ya. It's a helluva lot more work than cat shows.

    Congrats to Darth! (but what did he win for?)

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  10. hahaha hahaha hahaha

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  11. Awwwwww I still want to steal Darth Vader!!! He's so cute!

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  12. I am still so jealous of that cat...but I choose to not be bitter. Congratulations to you and to Darth Vader!

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  13. Maybe Darth licked his penis for the judge for extra points.

    My favorite cat scene EVER on TV was from "Friends" when Rachel got a hairless cat and Ross asked what it was. She said it was a cat. Then he asked why it was inside out, LOL.

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  14. Why don't I remember that scene, that's hilarious! And I'm pretty sure Darth Vader licks his penis simply because he can. Men. Can't live with them, can't shoot them.

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  15. Thank you, Jacqui! I'm glad you're not bitter, because when he's not busy being cute and cuddly, he tries to take down the house, one curtain at a time.

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  16. Jenn! Perhaps Darth Vader could come play with your cats? I'm sure it would be fine to just mail him to you.. Probably.

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  17. Det var bilden på den våta kissen, eller hur? :D

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  18. Oh, I have no idea. I just showed him and took whatever ribbon they offered me. He was the only male cat that day who happened to be a blue bicolor Ragdoll, so I'm pretty sure he got the ribbon just for being there. But they did have great things to say about him.


    I would never in a million years even attempt to show a dog. You are very brave, Double-O.

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  19. Thank you, Noname. I would love nothing more than to give your cats a new home, but sadly, our Darth Vader doesn't like other cats in his house and goes all lightsaber on them. Perhaps after we chop off his balls?

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  20. Really? I've never seen a cat willingly jump into the water, that's cute. Darth Vader sits outside the shower (no bathtub over here, this is Finland,) and gets his paws all wet while waiting for us to finish showering. So he apparently likes water just fine, as long as he can decide how much of it he gets on him. Silly cat.

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  21. Glad you think so! I happen to agree. ;)

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  22. Why am I not surprised... I bet Evil Twin named your cat, didn't she? ;) Awesome name, though!

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  23. Thank you! I will be waiting for Lola, just let me know when she's due to arrive and I'll set out the traps for her, err I mean, I'll roll out the red carpet. She sounds lovely.

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  24. Thanks! I actually have no idea what we did. I'm guessing there was no competition, because EX 1 is apparently a very good result.

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  25. Don't worry, Darth Vader didn't have to be sad and wet for very long, he got the blowdryer treatment when he was nice and clean.


    I know, the lady with the stroller had to be insane. At least I hope so, otherwise her priorities are seriously messed up.

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  26. Thank you! He does allow it, believe it or not. I think he hasn't really realized he can fight back and that his claws can be used as weapons. He's not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

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  27. Oh good. I'm happy Vader wasn't sad for long.

    And yes, that lady with the stroller IS insane!

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  28. Actually, you can (shoot them, that is). I have the perfect space under one of the honey locust trees in the back yard just in case. We keep digging up weird stuff out there, so what's one more skeleton?

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  29. Congratulations on your prize winning pussy. Actually I have one too (a prize I mean), but not exactly the same thing. He is a lovely cat.

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  30. Um... well... I push Mason in a stroller. Yep. I do. When I take Mason and Dixie for walks around the farm, Dixie goes on a leash and Mason hops right in his stroller and I zip it up. The front, sides and top are mesh and he's quite taken with his "ride."

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  31. Darth Vader is beautiful. Poor little guy having his photo plastered all over the Internet while he's drenched. What if his legion of female feline Facebook followers get a look at that. He'll be laughed out of cyberspace and then you'll be on the hook for years of cat psychotherapy.

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  32.  Yikes, I didn't think of that. I can barely afford my own psychotherapy.

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  33. Thanks, Linda, I'm very proud of my prize winning pussy.

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  34. Awesome, I'll keep that in mind.

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  35. I'm with Meleah, that's way less crazy. Although, a little crazy never hurt anyone.

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  36. Not to worry.  I have no shortage of crazy.  ;) 

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  37. He is beautiful! I'm glad Darth Vader beat out the pussy pussy in the stroller. Too bad you didn't get a picture of it. Did it wear a bonnet? Geesh! (I couldn't spell it). I can't believe what people do to their animals. And I've seen people walk their kids on a leash. I just put an electric collar on mine and let him run around the yard. 

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  38. You have an award over at my place :) 

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  39. I think I would go to more cat shows just s you can get to know these other people. They would definitely make good posts! Congrats Darth Vadar!!! BTW best cat name ever!!!

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  40. That's actually not a bad idea.. I could definitely use the blog fodder. And thanks, I kinda like the name, too! ;)

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  41. Hah, that's hilarious! Sadly, I didn't get a picture of the lady with the stroller. But if I ever take Darth Vader to a show again, I will definitely have my camera ready to go!

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  42. Congratulations on having the #1 pussy in all of Finland. That's quite an honor, and I hope you behave accordingly.  

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  43. What exactly does behave accordingly mean in this case? Perhaps regular grooming is enough..

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